From birth, children are thrust into a world of screens and technology. We know this offers some great benefits, but it also carries a significant list of negative consequences for developing brains.
During the crucial preschool developmental period, it’s important that parents set firm screen time boundaries to protect their children’s physical, emotional, and cognitive wellbeing.
I understand that this can be hard to do, especially when it feels much simpler to allow young children screen time to keep them occupied. In this article, we’ll explore why screen time boundaries are vital for preschoolers, provide strategies for boundary-setting, and offer practical tips on having age-appropriate conversations with your child about screen time limits.
Why screen time boundaries are important for 3 to 5-year-olds
Developmental milestones: At this age, children are developing language, social skills, and cognitive abilities. Research shows that excessive screen time in early childhood is linked to poorer performance in many developmental milestone areas, including communication and motor skills. Children learn best from engaging in hands-on activities that promote interaction with caregivers, peers, and their environment.
Mental health and attention issues: A recent study published in Preventive Medicine Reports linked higher amounts of screen time in preschool-aged children to increased rates of behavioral problems and attention issues. Young children need lots of time each day to play and interact with their world in ways to build attention span, creativity, and problem-solving skills.
They also need to experience frustration and boredom in order to develop emotional and behavioral regulation skills.
Impact on sleep: Exposure to screens, especially before bedtime, can interfere with sleep quality. Poor sleep in early childhood can lead to many problems in the short and long term, including irritability, concentration problems, social challenges, and slower cognitive development. Setting boundaries around when and how much screen time can help avoid these risks.
Given the potential problems that arise when young kids have too much screen time, it’s clear that setting screen time boundaries is not just about limiting screen exposure—it’s about promoting overall healthy development.
Tips for setting screen time boundaries for 3 to 5-year-olds
Create a schedule and stick to it
Decide how many minutes a day you are going to allow your child to use devices. Create a family screen time routine that clearly shows when screens can be used. This could include setting specific times for watching an educational show, using a tablet for learning games, or video chatting with family members. Use a visual chart or schedule to help them understand when screens are available and when they aren’t. Stick to the schedule consistently so your child knows what to expect.
For example, you could set a rule that screens are only allowed for 30 minutes after lunch or during specific times of the day when you need to prepare dinner. This helps prevent spontaneous screen use and reinforces structure.
You should also have a location where you collect and store devices when kids aren’t using them, as this helps avoid power struggles and the need for you to constantly monitor where the devices are and whether your children are using them.
Designate screen-free zones
For safety and hygiene reasons, bathrooms and bedrooms should always be screen-free zones, but youmight also decide that other areas of your home or property will be device-free. This encourages your child to engage in other activities, like playing with toys, helping with household activities, reading books, or spending time outside.
Model healthy screen use
Children learn by observing, so it’s vital for adults and older children in the family to model healthy screen habits for them. If they see you constantly on your phone or watching TV for long periods of time, they may become confused about why they have screen time limits. Show them how you balance screen time with other activities, like exercising, reading, or spending quality time together as a family. Enforce appropriate limits for older children in your home, as well as younger ones.
Use parental controls and monitoring tools
Technology can make managing kids’ screen time easier for us as parents! Parental control tools, like my preferred option Qustodio, allow you to set time limits, block inappropriate content, and monitor your child’s online activities. Device-level controls are also key to helping set and enforce screen time limits, and I highly encourage every parent to use them daily.
How to talk to 3 to 5-year-olds about screen time limits
Here are a few tips on how to approach these conversations:
Keep it simple and positive
Explain the benefits of balancing screen time with other activities in simple terms they can understand. You could say something like:
“Doing lots of different activities everyday helps your brain and body be healthy and strong.”
“We only use the tablet after lunch because we need time to do important things like play with our toys, read books, and go outside.”
By framing the conversation in a positive way, you’re helping your child understand that screen time isn’t being taken away—it’s being balanced with other important activities.
Set expectations in advance
Before your child uses a screen, clearly communicate how long they can use it and what will happen when their time is up. For example:
“You can watch your favorite show for 20 minutes, and then it will be time to turn it off and play outside. I’ll let you know when you have 5 minutes left.”
“Let’s set the timer for 30 minutes, and when it beeps I’ll help you put your tablet in the cupboard until tomorrow.”
This kind of advance warning helps prepare your child for the transition from screen time to other activities.
Be prepared for disappointment and upset
Young children tend to have big feelings when they can’t do something they want! Your child’s unhappiness, frustration, and upset about screen time limits are completely normal, and are not a sign that you should give them more time. Acknowledging and empathizing with their feelings, while firmly sticking to the boundary you set is key.
You might say things like:
“I know you love watching that show and you’re mad that I am turning it off. It’s OK to feel mad. You can watch another episode tomorrow after lunch.”
“You want to play games on my phone and you’re sad that I said no. I understand that you’re feeling sad about it, and my job is to keep you healthy. Would you like to go on the swings or read a book?”
One of the best things you can do to support your preschooler’s development is set and maintain firm screen time limits. It’s essential for their physical, emotional, and cognitive development.
Children who learn how to manage their device use in healthy ways from a young age are better able to do it as they get older. The goal isn’t to eliminate screen time altogether, but to balance it with other important activities, such as physical play, creativity, and real-world social interactions. By establishing these habits early on, you’re setting the stage for healthier, happier kids as they grow.
